Yankees at an Airport

My aunt needed to get to the airport and my mother happily volunteered her time and that of mine and my younger sister. Our trip should have been uneventful, but when you have a couple yankees in a small car for any amount of time things can get crazy pretty quick.

We began our journey to the DFW airport peacefully enough. Then, to my disgust, my mom and aunt quickly started to sing along to any song, including hip-hop, rock, and country. We finally made it to the exit off of HW 121. Suddenly my aunt turned to look out her window and began screaming at the top of her lungs. We all tried to ask her what was wrong. She turned horrified and just pointed out her window. In the car next to us a grown man was picking his nose. My mom and sister began to freak out, too, and the rest of the ride they all talked about it. I didn’t find it too disgusting; I have an older brother who has done much worse in his lifetime.

Anyone who has been to the airport knows that it’s hard to find a parking place close to the entrance and so most people try to park right in the unloading zone. But my mom doesn’t mind the walk, and she prefers to park in a spot where her car door won’t get dinged. So, we were about to pull into the lot when a lady in her Cadillac Escalade stopped right in front of us.

I told my mom we should just wait a minute and she’d be on her way. My mom agreed for all of 30 seconds. She started to beep and yell, and when the lady refused to move, my aunt joined in. For ten minutes we waited for this lady to decide what she was going to do. Finally my mom had had enough. She rolled down her window. I thought she was about to curse the lady out but my mom surprised me. She spit out her chewing gum and threw it right onto the lady’s windshield. This got attention fast. The lady flipped us off and moved out of the way so that we could get by—but just barely.

We got my aunt’s luggage out of the trunk and made our way inside to the ticket desk. My aunt secured her ticket and we walked with her as far as they would let us. Then the real fun began. My aunt—the most emotionally loud person you’ll ever met—started to cry and to hug us as if she were never going to see us again (she was only going to be gone for a week). She told us to pray for her because we never knew what might happen during the flight. And then she proceeded to tell us exactly what that might be: What if there’s a malfunction with the engines or, worse, what if there’s a terrorist on board?

We told her to be quiet because by this point she had drawn quite the crowd. We said everything would be fine, gave her a couple extra hugs, and sent her on her way. As we waved goodbye, a couple of passengers gave us angry looks. We just shrugged them off and headed towards the car.

My sister hoped we could make it out of there without any more grown men and their noses. Soon we had gotten far enough away that we couldn’t see the airport anymore. I was glad to be away from it. Then, my mom elbowed me, smiled, and said: “Now girls, remember we have to come pick her up in a week.”


Category: Airports

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